One mistake you'd like to avoid again...

[blinc]

I'm not a parent, but almost all of the friends we have are. One thing I hear quite often is, if I could go back I would never have done this... or really wish I had done that.

Was wondering what experiences you've had, that you wish you would have handled differently? It just might help someone else with a decision they're facing. :)

Things like allowing children to sleep in the same bed with you?
Getting up at every cry?
Preschool?
Making them eat their veggies?
Handling their fears?

[In_His_Shadow]

Now that my girls are 23(Nov 4) and 17 I am able to look back and see where I might have handled things differently or did anything we do affect them more than we realized?

Some of the things we did I'm sure we did just because "I will not do what my parents did thing".

Our bed was always open if the girls were scared or lonely. It was a safe haven for them and they never abused it.

I have to admit I was up every time they cried. It wore me out but, I never could stand to hear them cry. I always thought if they are crying they need something, milk, diaper changed, stomach hurting, or just need to be touched and held. I never did see any bad side effects of this they are both very tender hearted towards children also.

I was a stay at home mom so mine never did preschool or mothers day out.

Never made them eat anything they truly dislike. My husband and I both had horrible memories of being made to finish our plates of liver until it was all gone. Sometimes you just don't like whats on your plate. Now I never made seperate meals or anything like that.

I would have to say looking back I would have chilled out alittle more. So what if the house wasn't perfectly clean, everthing in its place, and all spick and span. I remember one time when my oldest daughter was in her bedroom and I was painting it. She was about 2 and without me seeing she just knocked over the whole gallon of paint onto the carpet. From there she walked with paint on her feet into every room in the house, sitting on the furniture. I remember I got so upset and when I think about it now, my goodness she was a baby and nothing that couldn't be fixed was hurt. I never whipped my girls because of past child abuse on myself. So that part of the disipline was always left up to my husband.

It's amazing how resilent children are. I think bottom line if a child feels unconditional love and support they can rebound from any mistakes us parents make.

CJ