Karenluvs6
11-14-2000, 09:01 AM
Two men held up a bank. They cleaned out the cash drawers and
then herded the tellers and clerks into the vault. They were
getting ready to make their getaway when one of the tellers
whispered, "Hey, buddy, would you do me a favor?"
One of the robbers said, "What's on your mind, pal?" "Would
you mind taking the books too? I'm five thousand short."
------------------------------------------------------------
A tourist is staying in a posh hotel and is in the breakfast
room. Hungry, the tourist calls the head waiter over.
"I would like one really runny egg, not quite cooked, please,
and one that is hard boiled, and some burnt toast with some
butter straight from the freezer. Oh, and can you bring me
some weak luke warm coffee?" asked the tourist.
"Certainly," says the head waiter, "but it is rather a complicated
order."
"It can't be all that difficult. It is what you brought me yesterday!"
exclaimed the tourist
------------------------------------------------------------
A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says
the condoms come in packs of 3, 9, or 12 and asks which the young man
wants.
"Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's
really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's "the night."
We're
having dinner with her parents, and then we're going out after that.
And I have a feeling that I'm going to get lucky, so you better give me
the 12 pack. The young man makes his purchase and leaves.
Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her
parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He
begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl
leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious
person."
He leans over to her and whispers, "You never told me that your father
was a pharmacist."
------------------------------------------------------------
John sat in his attorney's office. "Do you want the bad news
first or the terrible news?" the lawyer said.
"Give me the bad news first." said John.
"Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars."
exclaimed the lawyer.
"That's the bad news?" asked John incredulously. "I can't wait
to hear the terrible news."
"It's of you and your mistress." said the lawyer.
------------------------------------------------------------
Have a great day gang!
then herded the tellers and clerks into the vault. They were
getting ready to make their getaway when one of the tellers
whispered, "Hey, buddy, would you do me a favor?"
One of the robbers said, "What's on your mind, pal?" "Would
you mind taking the books too? I'm five thousand short."
------------------------------------------------------------
A tourist is staying in a posh hotel and is in the breakfast
room. Hungry, the tourist calls the head waiter over.
"I would like one really runny egg, not quite cooked, please,
and one that is hard boiled, and some burnt toast with some
butter straight from the freezer. Oh, and can you bring me
some weak luke warm coffee?" asked the tourist.
"Certainly," says the head waiter, "but it is rather a complicated
order."
"It can't be all that difficult. It is what you brought me yesterday!"
exclaimed the tourist
------------------------------------------------------------
A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says
the condoms come in packs of 3, 9, or 12 and asks which the young man
wants.
"Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's
really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's "the night."
We're
having dinner with her parents, and then we're going out after that.
And I have a feeling that I'm going to get lucky, so you better give me
the 12 pack. The young man makes his purchase and leaves.
Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her
parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He
begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl
leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious
person."
He leans over to her and whispers, "You never told me that your father
was a pharmacist."
------------------------------------------------------------
John sat in his attorney's office. "Do you want the bad news
first or the terrible news?" the lawyer said.
"Give me the bad news first." said John.
"Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars."
exclaimed the lawyer.
"That's the bad news?" asked John incredulously. "I can't wait
to hear the terrible news."
"It's of you and your mistress." said the lawyer.
------------------------------------------------------------
Have a great day gang!