Going Off the Deep End

[kellymoore79]

I am sure that we've all heard about school shootings and workplace shootings and other things like that. I get angry too, but I don't take it there. Why do people go off the deep end? Is it society? Is it mental abnormalities? What is it?

When I was in 10th grade, we had this guy try to plan a school shooting and he got caught. The reason why was because he had been bullied all his life and was sick of it (or so he said). I understand why people get upset with society and the people in it...sometimes very upset...but I don't understand why they take it here. First of all, I don't like the idea of murder. Second, you're going to be taking out innocents as well while the people who likely pushed you to this point are laughing as the cops take you away (or blow your head off) and saying, "see I told you he was crazy?"

What about society or people in general makes you angry? Let's get it out here, because venting this way is healthy. :)

[Radu]

I wouldn't blame it on "society", because that term is just too broad. Millions of people spend their life in the same society, and only a few resort to mass violence. Of course, it's a mix of many factors

One, I think, is the one we hear a lot, which is their parents (or lack thereof). If they were raised aggressively, then they have a powerful impression that violence is a quick way to settle a dispute... as long you're more violent than your opponent.

Second, I honestly think a lot of it is the entertainment they watch/play (and I know a lot of people hate when people say that). I don't think games/movies create killers. (Many normal people play violent videogames, and violence is not any new thing), but I don't think anybody can deny that it's glamorized. A person, who feels pride because they do the best on those kinds of games, naturally would feel a lot more confident with the real thing.

Then, the final thing that puts it all together is the harassment they receive (or feel they receive). If they've felt humiliated and cornered for long enough, and feel there's no possible way to get out of, peacefully, then they're going to see those acts of violence as the only possible chance they have to become "normal". It's kind of the "Whatever happens, it can't get any worse" mentality. That's not true, of course, but they're so blinded by rage that they can only think of how good and glamorized they'd feel to finally get revenge.

That doesn't just apply to high school students, but can also apply to a fired employee or ex-spouse who feels that they were so wrongly victimized that there's no other choice.

So, yes, it is a mental disorder, but I think it's possible that it's one that's created and not always inherited.

[Justawoman]

Well if you want to go back to High School, travel there with me, a trip of 22 years past. I remember the counselors. But were we ever truly encouraged to go talk to her/him with real problems? I can't remember being told it was okay to vent anger, fear, true deep seeded frustration.

Maybe there in lies the problem? Perhaps we are told, through words and actions, to suck it up when life becomes difficult. So when it truly becomes beyond difficult we still try to portray ourselves as being able to cope, when in our own little world we are screaming for help.

Maybe that is why folks snap, as kelly said, " he/she just became sick with the whole situation."

Bullying in itself truly needs to be addressed and stopped as soon as it is apparent that it is going on. A very small minded and nasty person resorts to bullying. I don't care what their circumstances in their personal life, it is never okay to vent in this fashion.

I am proud of our school it has started the Rachel's Challenge program.
http://www.rachelschallenge.com/

By the way Kelly, thanks for starting a new thread. You are right we do need to be able to talk about this subject. It could happen to anyone, that is, being on the receiving end of a random shooting or act of violence.

[kellymoore79]

I remember the counselors. But were we ever truly encouraged to go talk to her/him with real problems? I can't remember being told it was okay to vent anger, fear, true deep seeded frustration.

Maybe there in lies the problem? Perhaps we are told, through words and actions, to suck it up when life becomes difficult. So when it truly becomes beyond difficult we still try to portray ourselves as being able to cope, when in our own little world we are screaming for help.

By the way Kelly, thanks for starting a new thread. You are right we do need to be able to talk about this subject. It could happen to anyone, that is, being on the receiving end of a random shooting or act of violence.

You're welcome justawoman.

Excellent post and I do mean the whole thing. Once again, you've shown yourself to be a thoughful caring person through your posts. And you really made me think. I thought back to my counselors and come to think of it, you're right....we never were given the chance to feel like we could really come to them and vent and talk about things. They were basically there for class scheduling and that's pretty much it for us.

When you said that we get the "suck it up" message, you're absolutely right. It is just not in the high school arena...it is everywhere. Brushing things under the rug won't make it go away...but there is going to come a time when that rug isn't going to be alble to hold much more.

[Justawoman]

I am working on the sensitive end of me Kelly. Thanks for the compliment.

[Grimey]

I think people have it too easy today. If everything isn't exactly the way I want it, I'm going to go off the deep end. We're just a bunch of whiners, IMO. I think parents don't let their children suffer enough adversity, they are always bailing them out of situations.

200 years ago, if the winter was too cold or the summer was too hot or you didn't get enough rain, your crops probably failed, your animals died, and you were wondering where the next meal was going to come from. The children worked in the fields alongside their parents. Your kids were dying of whooping cough and diptheria. You might have had one pair of shoes, and your really good Christmas was a doll your mother made by hand. You cleaned your clothes by hand. Healthcare consisted of whether or not you lived close enough to a doctor for him to get there before you died. You had no air conditioning or refrigeration.

Did you know that just 100 years ago, your life expectancy was 47 years? 10% of all infants died. 14 times more people died from infectious disease than do now. Twice as many died by accident. One fourth as many graduated from high school. Heck, just 30 years ago, our air polution was 33 times worse than it is today.

We're a bunch of whiney butts.

I'm not longing for the good ole days. I just think people don't realize that most Americans live at Disney World compared to third-world nations or compared to our own nation just 150 years ago.