Karenluvs6
11-28-2000, 06:33 AM
A high-school student came home one night rather depressed.
"What's the matter, son." asked his mother.
"Aw, gee," said the boy, "it's my grades. They're all wet."
"What do you mean 'all wet?'" asked his mother.
"You know," he replied, "below C-level."
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A man took a walk in the local park and wanted to sit down for
a while, so he found the nearest bench and sat down next to a
man with a dog at his feet.
"Does your dog bite?" the man asked.
"No." the other man replied.
A few minutes later the man reached over to pet the dog, and the
dog took a huge chunk out of his hand. Nursing his now injured
hand the first man says, "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!"
The second man said indignantly, "That's not my dog."
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Mom with a daughter in the 3rd grade!!
Daughter: Mom i solved the puzzle at school.Is it because I am
blonde??
Mom: No honey..its because you are smart!
Daughter: Mom i won the race at school today.Is it because I am
a blonde??
Mom: No honey,its because you are fast.
Daughter:Mom I am the tallest in class. Is it because I am a
blonde??
Mom: No honey its because you are 29 years old!!!!
------------------------------------------------------------
As they were leaving church, Mrs. Smith asked her husband, "Do you
think that the Johnson girl is tinting her hair?"
"I didn't even see her." admitted Mr. Smith.
"And that dress Mrs. Tate was wearing," continued Mrs. Smith,
"really, don't tell me you think that's the proper outfit for a
mother of two."
"I'm afraid I didn't notice that either." said Mr. Smith.
"Oh, for heaven's sake," snapped Mrs. Smith. "a lot of good it
does you to go to church."
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Have a great day!
"What's the matter, son." asked his mother.
"Aw, gee," said the boy, "it's my grades. They're all wet."
"What do you mean 'all wet?'" asked his mother.
"You know," he replied, "below C-level."
------------------------------------------------------------
A man took a walk in the local park and wanted to sit down for
a while, so he found the nearest bench and sat down next to a
man with a dog at his feet.
"Does your dog bite?" the man asked.
"No." the other man replied.
A few minutes later the man reached over to pet the dog, and the
dog took a huge chunk out of his hand. Nursing his now injured
hand the first man says, "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!"
The second man said indignantly, "That's not my dog."
------------------------------------------------------------
Mom with a daughter in the 3rd grade!!
Daughter: Mom i solved the puzzle at school.Is it because I am
blonde??
Mom: No honey..its because you are smart!
Daughter: Mom i won the race at school today.Is it because I am
a blonde??
Mom: No honey,its because you are fast.
Daughter:Mom I am the tallest in class. Is it because I am a
blonde??
Mom: No honey its because you are 29 years old!!!!
------------------------------------------------------------
As they were leaving church, Mrs. Smith asked her husband, "Do you
think that the Johnson girl is tinting her hair?"
"I didn't even see her." admitted Mr. Smith.
"And that dress Mrs. Tate was wearing," continued Mrs. Smith,
"really, don't tell me you think that's the proper outfit for a
mother of two."
"I'm afraid I didn't notice that either." said Mr. Smith.
"Oh, for heaven's sake," snapped Mrs. Smith. "a lot of good it
does you to go to church."
------------------------------------------------------------
Have a great day!