I could use help

[misternice]

ok i will be long winded here and type stuff and probably have punctuation and spelling errors. but i need help and anyone that can lend ideas i am listening

been married 9 years and i love it. my wife the past 2 years has fallen out of love and hates being married. she says we are best friends, which i think you should marry your best friend. anyways... i have tried it all....changed to a better job, do the work and cooking around the house i am always nice to her. i have literally tried everything for 2 years.

we are together for finances. she cant afford to leave me and our daughter yet. she wants to go live alone and find herself and of course i will let her see our daughter anytime she wants. i love her dearly... she flirts with men online and it bugs me alot but its innocent to her. she never meets anyone or talks on the phone. yeah some will say she is cheating but i am positive she is not. she is with me all the time except for at work and then even at work we are in instant messages all day. so i really cant say there has been the slightest chance she is cheating. i just want that out of the equation.

she left me for about 10 days once and decided that was not what she wanted and came back all in love and happy and all that stuff. after a month passed its back to the same old nothing. no sex no love no kisses no anything except feeling like i live with my room mate.

ok i want to fix this but after exhausting all ideas i have no idea where to turn to next, she refuses the last idea i have which is marriage counselling. i have soley been the one trying to fix this alone, she has no interest in fixing things.

what do i do now?? please dont blast me and make fun of me i am being sincere and desperate here

thanks to all who have good input

[jamesglewisf]

That's a terrible situation. I'm sorry you are going through this. It sounds like you have worked very hard at this, and I'm impressed that you were willing to try marriage counseling -- a lot of men won't.

I wish I could tell you something to do. It sounds like you have tried most of what I would have suggested.

Perhaps you should trying seeing the counselor yourself. I would try one at a church somewhere who isn't just going to tell you to go ahead and divorce her.

Other than that, I would just pray a lot and keep doing what you are doing. Unfortunately, you can't control someone else's actions. You can do everything right to the best of your ability, and she could still walk out.

This is really an awful situation. I'm sorry for you.

[Sophialiu]

no sex no love no kisses no anything except feeling like i live with my room mate--it will hard to stay with her.